Unpolished

After 33 years, I'm getting pretty comfortable in my own skin. But I still find myself showing a polished exterior to people in some situations. Like smiling sometimes when it's not necessary, laughing at a joke I don't think is funny or not straight up telling you when I think you're wrong. I do this for two reasons. 1) It prevents friction and allows me to slide through situations where I don't actually want to deal with differences, and 2) I think a lot of people have very sensitive egos and get their feelings hurt too easily when someone is honest with them.

Well, the first is self-serving and the second may be unfair to people because I'm assuming they're not strong enough to deal the full force of me. So, I'm going to stop doing those things as much as possible. Will it lead to in-depth discussions that I don't really want to have with some people? Yes. Will it lead to some people getting their feelings hurt and not liking me anymore? Probably. Will you get to see my inexplicable mood swings? Likely. Will I accidentally say "fuck" at some point and ruffle your feathers? Guaranteed.

But guess what? When I laugh, I'll mean it 100%. When I disagree, it's because I respect you enough to tell you I think you're wrong...and because I think you can handle it.

So here we go. A little less polished and a lot more real.