Ghosting

Ghosting is the act of leaving a social situation without telling people goodbye. One minute you’re there, then a while later, people wonder, “Where’d he go?” Learning about this technique was incredibly liberating for me because I was always the guy who either stayed until the end of the party or told everyone I knew goodbye before I left. I used to be big on goodbyes. But as I’ve grown, and as I’ve grown older, I’ve felt less of an urge to say goodbye. Because goodbyes are usually either irrelevant, disappointing or straight up depressing.

I’ve found it’s much better to just leave. To move on as if whatever event I was at was just one of the points along the journey, not noteworthy enough to demand a proper farewell.

And I’ve started to extend this act into parts of my life much more significant than a social situation like a party. In situations of extreme disappointment with a relationship, in cases where someone brings unwanted drama into my life or even in cases where I deem the benefit less than the effort involved … ghost. At this point in my life, I don’t feel like I owe anyone an explanation, and I feel no need to justify the disappearance. I just go.

Because there’s a power in that. I was here. Now I’m gone. And there’s nothing you can do to change it.